Sunday, January 29, 2012

Mystery of the Murdered Man Part 29 (Finale Pt. 1)

Gary the P popped in his CD. It was all over. His dubstep'n remix of Boston's 70s hit anthem "More Than a Feeling" was sure to disappoint even the most musically inept ears; It seems Stan "Skrillex" Devlin had him beat. The song began and suddenly, something miraculous happened! Bass drops occured in all the right places! Scratches and sweeps and phases and loops happened left and right in perfect synchronicity! This was a miracle! The song was so good that even the Devlin's henchmen were "getting down"!

"Gary the Lover! you've done it!" shouted Calara. She embraced him with a blast of walrus fury.

"I don't know what happened!" Gary the Pee gurgled. "My remix was terrible! It's like God himself intervened on my behalf!"

"Not so fast, kid," Batman growled. "I haven't heard a remix that good in years. This can only be the work of one DJ, and if I'm right, we're all in trouble."

Devlin seemed to agree. "I agree."

"Guys! I know we've spent the entire 28 previous parts of this story battling it out over the fates of the mayorres, but we may need to unify against this new villain," Gary the P proposed. "Speaking of which, Batman, who is this DJ?"

"It's my oldest nemesis. DJ Jazzy Joker, otherwise known as Joker," Batman growled.

laughed a maniacal voice.

"WHERE ARE YOU, DJ JAZZY JOKER?!" Batman growled more loudlier.

"Right here, Bat!" Out of nowhere, the Joker popped out of nowhere in a pop. "And I've come to wreak my havoc on Springfield once and for all!"

Gary the P knew that the plot to kill Mayor Wes was now irrelevant. There was a much bigger problem at hand, but this final battle could only be settled once and for all if unity were achieved with Devlin and his mafia.

"Guys! We must unite!" Gary the P pleased.

"Why should we? I like this Joker guy" said Stan.

"Because he'll destroy us all if we don't!" Gary the P huffed and puffed.

"Oh! Good point!" and Stan became an irrevokable ally to our heroes along with the rest of his mafia thus resulting in the greatest anti-climax in literary history.

"Oh! How cute! The little heroes want to try and stop me!" DJ Jazzy Joker grunted.

But Gary the P and his friends were never to be intimidated.

"Let's finish this the way we began," Gary the P began. "With no knowledge of each other's existence."


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