Friday, January 20, 2012

It's The Murder Mystery, and It's Part 20

Karen's broadsword was drawn. Charlie the A was nervously sweating. Gary the P watched anxiously. Hubert was somewhere watching. And Calara was nowhere to be found. Stan was somewhere. It was the perfect storm, so to speak.

"It's time." Karen said severely.

"Time for what?" Charlie said jitterily. 

 Karen yelled as she rushed Charlie with the javelin she had drawn, throwing the broadsword to Gary the P to cut himself free from the cinder blocks. In a moment of actiony awesomeness, Gary the P caught the sword between his legs, grabbed it with his teeth, and swung his head down to cut the tooth floss that was buckling him down.

"Thanks, Karen!" Gary the P scowled.

"No problem, kid," she said as she drew her halberd from its sheath and walked intently towards the trembling Charlie. "Now to take care of you." she grumped.

"Not so fast!" said a voice from high above. "We gonn' getchu good!

Everyone looked above them to see Jack and Franklin descending from the ceiling from a very thick rope. Hubert, recognizing the cue, started playing "Sabotage" by Beastie Boys over the intercom.

This sequence only lasted for about three seconds, as Karen had drawn her longbow and fired an arrow at Jack and Franklin, piercing their pancreas and appendix, respectively.

"Graunch!" Franklin said with his last breath. Jack had actually been dead for about three hours prior to this.

There was a still silence in the air as everyone in the room saluted the fallen man. A trumpet blared "Taps" in an obnoxiously thin tone. It was all too serene.

Karen took this opportunity to draw her spear from her pocket and fire it at Charlie. It was then that she realized Charlie had been a hologram this entire time!

"Well tickle my whiskers! Ain't that a kick in the head?" Gary the P said. It is worth noting that the author has cleaned his statement to a G rating, as what he actually said would be deemed worthy of the death sentence in France it was so vulgar.

"I'll see you guys... later..." Hubert said with a snarl. A  burst of black darkness filled the room, and they could hear quick limping footsteps across the warehouse. Gary the P remembered that Ghana was an African nation. Instantaneously, the lights dimmed back on. 

"Ergh!" Karen erghed as she sheathed her ball-and-chain. "We were so close! And that was a huge dramatic build up! What went wrong?"

"I think it's obvious." Gary the P said with a smirk.

Karen waited a while for the second part to his thought, but eventually decided her job here was done for now. "I'm going to go back on the road and keep tracking him down. You stay out of trouble." she warned.

"Yes, captain." Gary the P said honorably.

Karen drew her moped and skedaddled on out of there.

Gary the P sat alone in the warehouse thinking to himself. He wondered where he should head now, or if he should just stay here and wait for the action to come to him.

Suddenly, Gary the P heard something from the corner. It sounded like a whimper...

"Donde uvas?" Gary the P asked.

"Gary... the... P..." Calara moaned.


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